Living on Purpose - Melissa Musing

Hmm....You know, the interesting thing is that if you are always growing, and learning, then I think you are probably on "track". Or even "on purpose". Even if it doesn't feel like it. For years, I have felt that my profession didn't perfectly suit me. I enjoyed the hard work, I felt that I was growing, mostly, but I had this hunger for something different. I couldn't put my finger on it, but it kept me exploring. So I went from undecided engineering in college, to Andersen Consulting, to IBM (IT Consulting, project mgmt, to sales, to sales management). I should have had a clue when my favorite freshman class was "Great Ideas of Western Culture", which all the other engineers in training referred to as "GFI" (Great F...ing Ideas - you fill in the blanks).

How many of us go through our entire lives feeling that there must be something else, a better fit? Or perhaps burying the hunger so deep that we don't even notice it anymore?

Anyway, without getting really long-winded, as a sales manager at IBM, I got introduced to professional coaching, and my whole body and soul just went ...aaahhhh.... You know the feeling, when you fall into your favorite chair (or bed) at the end of the day? I knew that this would become part of my future. It wasn't love at first sight, but almost. The first exposure was about 2 hours of coaching training (very simplistic) in a 2 day mandatory manager's class. It wasn't enough, but I was intrigued, and I scratched the itch. I brought the instructor, who ended up becoming my first coach, into my sales team's kickoff meeting the following quarter. The big ...ahhhh... and aha came during my first 2.5 day coaching class, almost 9 months later. It was an IBM-sponsored workshop, and it was like a retreat. (Note: the content of this 2.5 days comes from CTI - Coaches Training Institute. Check it out at http://www.thecoaches.com/index.html)

So, all these years, was I off course, or "on purpose"? Well, it's a matter of perspective, I suppose. It became clearer to me as Dan and I faced this latest cancer "O'Marathon". We both had to rely on all of "whom we had become on our journey", separately and together, in order to climb that next cancer mountain. It was in the way, and there was no going around it. By the way, it had lots of "false peaks". Just when we thought we had reached a summit, and could surely start the descent, another peak loomed around the corner.

We used everything we had learned about the web, about business travel, about frequent flier miles. We leveraged our personal and professional networks, and created new ones. We leveraged our knowledge of nutrition, and supplements. We leveraged our ability to communicate with others about "difficult" topics. We leveraged our medical and hospital experiences with my broken leg, and with the illnesses of other family members. The kids and I drew strength from our local church, where we had only become actively involved in the previous year! And I drew on all the personal growth and professional development resources that I had used as a sales manager and a coach. And I used them in parenting, in all my relationships, and in ways I am sure I don't even comprehend.

So, was I living "on purpose"? I couldn't have articulated exactly what my life purpose is. But I was learning, growing, and making good decsions that kept me moving in the right direction. I feel sure in retrospect that I have had "angels" or "divine energy" or the Hand of God (pick your language) guiding me, supporting me, nudging me. Would I have said the same thing a few years ago? Probably not...

What about you? Are you growing, learning, and listening to your intuition? Are you on purpose? I postulate that you are. Are you "where you want to be"? Maybe not! Maybe so! It's just really important to notice! Pause, reflect, and notice. You know the answers, it's all inside of you. The search within can be very interesting, and can last a lifetime.

My two bits... now how about yours?